


Back to the Fade

by charoula



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-15
Updated: 2015-02-15
Packaged: 2018-03-12 21:56:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3356741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charoula/pseuds/charoula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Solas takes Fendes into the Fade again. He is decides to tell her a secret there. Fluff & Angst</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back to the Fade

**Author's Note:**

> A major spoiler that annuls the canon ending completely. Be warned

"Ar lath ma." Solas hugged Fendes from behind, wrapping his arms around her stomach. With a low sigh, the mage rested his chin on her shoulder.

"I love you too, vhenan." The Inquisitor replied.

The Dalish Elves used a mixture of the languages, as the Elven language got mostly lost through the ages. But the words that she could speak, had a special ring to them. They sounded more important to her ears, and she was positive they had a similar effect to the ancient elf now holding her. She made a mental note to ask him to teach her more Elven words.

Without turning to look at him, she lifted her arm, brought her hand to his face, cupping his cheek.

The full moon bathed everything with a silver light, making the snowy mountains around them glow.

“What a beautiful night.” Fendes sighed longingly.

Since she started dating Solas, she seldom had time to have some moments alone with him. The fact that she had two free days before heading out in the wilds again was exciting. Not only did she want to spend time with Solas, but she missed sleeping in the Inquisitor's bed, it was so soft and comforting, completely the opposite to the tents she shared with the squad.

“Nothing can surpass your beauty.” He gently spun her around, so he could get a better look at her.

The woman blushed and looked down. Her personality stood miles away from his. She was cheerful, witty and maybe even childish at times. She loved him, but when he was all serious, all she wanted to do is mock him. But now, he was being... romantic and serious at the same time, making her embarrassed, unsure how to react.

Fendes rested her hands on his chest and looked at him under her eyelashes. “Thanks, I guess.” Her lips turned into an awkward upwards curl, almost like a smile.

He nodded slightly, and with that movement the Herald felt his breath on her skin. She leaned into his chest, hiding her growing blush. The man embraced her and gave her a moment to regain her composure. Her manners and behavior never ceased to fascinate him.

“It's getting cold out here. It'd be wiser to go inside.” He decided to break the silence when Fendes didn't seem interested in speaking.

That gave her the chance to be her usual self again. “Talking about the weather, now? I thought we've gone past that.” She chuckled.

“I'm just... Never mind.” He sighed exasperated.

“You are just, what?” She teased him.

“Worried. About you.”

There, he was doing it again. He cared about her and it felt genuine. Never in her wildest dreams would Fendes ever think that she would be dating someone who she initially thought as unnerving and intimidating. But there he was, just a couple of inches away from her, with heartfelt emotions on his face, his hands touching her back and making her shiver.

“See, I am right. You are cold.” He concluded as if he knew better.

“That's not why I'm shivering, you dumbass!” She playfully poked his forehead.

“It's because of you!” Fendes released herself from his grip and walked back inside.

“Was I just caught unprepared?” He followed behind her, closing the balcony doors. Solas smiled as he turned to look at the Inquisitor.

“Obviously!” She sat heavily on the white couch near the entrance of the room, knocking down a book that she was supposed to be reading. Instead, she was wasting her time with Solas.

It was a boring book, she didn't really care about human history, let alone genealogical trees. She was meant to be impressing some noble or another with her knowledge, but she'd rather not even meet them and let the Inquisition's actions impress them.

“Isn't this book the one you need to study?” He picked it up from the floor and balanced it on the arm of the couch.

“Yeah, so? I'd rather spend my time talking with you. Besides, I'm too tired to remember all these names and dates.”

The man sat next to her, leaning back against the pillows. “I can help you memorize it.”

“Maybe tomorrow.” She fell on her side, resting her head on his thigh.

Solas smiled with the carefree of her character and gently removed stray hairs away from her face. They Sylaise vallaslin bothered him, but he couldn't deny her heart and beauty hidden under it. And deep down, he knew that her personality matched to what Sylaise stood for. She was worshiped as a gentle goddess, who helped the Elves in many ways. She gave Elves their healing knowledge and taught them how to use fire.

Fendes was... just like fire. She was all that was good and had all that was important. She had a pure, loyal heart, set only to do what was right. Her positivity, her modesty, her humor made her perfect. Did he want a perfect leader or a perfect partner, Solas couldn't tell. But he hated betraying her, lying to her, more than any other member of the Inquisition. She deserved to know that she loved a traitor, but it was difficult for him to break her heart, for he grew to care about her.

But a fire, had two sides. She had to learn the truth at the right time, otherwise, she could burn everything down to a crisp, taking the Inquisition with her, leaving no hope to defeat Corypheous and take back the Orb of Destruction.

He was so angry with himself for giving the Orb away, for not being there for the Elves, for falling in love with her. The only way out of it, was more lies and a broken heart. Maybe two, but he didn't care about his anymore. He had to pay the price.

“Vhenan?” He asked after a while, but the woman was fast asleep on his lap.

He smiled sorrowfully and took her into the Fade once more. Maybe that was the best time to reveal the truth. In the Fade, everything was simpler.

 

* * *

 

Fendes fluttered her piercing green eyes to the sound of a subtle wind. Her head was still resting on his thigh. She looked up and noticed that Solas was awake too.

“Hi.” She mumbled while a smile appeared on her face. “Did I sleep too long?”

“It depends on your standards of long.”

She shrugged as she sat up. “I miss sleeping like a normal person. You know. A good night's sleep.”

“I'm sorry I didn't let you sleep, then.”

“Ah, don't worry about it. But anyway... We are in the Fade, aren't we?” It just dawned on her that they were not in Skyhold anymore and the surface below her was not the fluffy white couch.

She took a closer look and realized that the room around her was a dark cave, not her quarters. They were far enough to not have a straight view of the outside, but she could still see the light of the night's sky filtering into the cave.

“Yes. I wanted to show you something.”

“You wanted to show me a cave?” She chuckled and wrapped her arms around his neck. “There are plenty of these back home.”

Her own words surprised her. She didn't know what home was anymore. Did she belong to her clan? Did she belong to Skyhold? Or was the man in front of her, her _home_?

“Not the cave. What's outside.” He pointed towards the dim light coming from the entrance. His hands trailed down her arms, untying them from the back of his neck. He kissed her left palm, right on the Anchor and pulled her up after him. “Come on.”

Fendes always took her night vision for granted but for the first time, she was glad for being able to see his lips touching the palm of her hand.

“Alright.” She smiled, knowing that he could see her as well and followed him willingly.

Her jaw dropped at the view that stood before her. “So beautiful!” She exclaimed with a small laugh. She took a few steps forward, admiring her surroundings and then turned around to look at Solas. “Thank you for bringing me here!” Fendes smiled like a child.

The Herald of Andraste returned her attention to the sky. It was something she had never seen before. The land around them looked pretty barren, covered in rocks and some smaller flora, but the sky took her breath away.

A green and red curtain, ever-changing, was turning the night into day. The colors never seemed to stop, always switching hues, from green to blue, to purple, to pink, to red.

“So beautiful.” She repeated still in awe.

In the meantime, Solas had closed in on her. “I thought you might like it.” He answered from behind her.

She spun around to face him. “I do. I really do, vhenan.” The woman stepped on her toes and joined their lips in a tender kiss. “Thank you.”

He pulled back, hesitating. “I need to talk to you. That's why I brought you here.”

“Should I worry?”

“This is not a joke, vhenan. Yes, you should.”

She closed her fingers around his wrist. “Come on, let's take a seat.” She pointed at a nearby rock.

Solas followed her without questions, taking a seat beside her.

“Now, I'm all ears.” She said with a low voice, trying not to show her nervousness.

“Fendes... Have you ever had questions about me?” He asked without looking at her.

“What do you mean? I mean... There are things I don't understand about you, that I'd like to, but it doesn't matter. I love you, anyway.” She brought her hand up and caressed his face.

Solas closed his eyes, enjoying her touch, but that didn't help him at all, considering the decision he made before bringing her into the Fade. He took her hand into his and pulled it away from his face, but kept holding onto it.

“I'm not who you think I am.”

“Huh? What are you trying to say?” She looked at him confused, slightly tilting her head.

A sigh escaped his mouth. “What do you know about the betrayal of the Elven Gods?”

Fendes's confusion was getting greater by the minute. “What-?”

“Just answer me.”

She closed her eyes and sighed, letting some tension out with her exhalation. “I know that they lived separately, but they co-existed with the human gods. There was a certain god, Fen'Harel, who traveled between the two pantheons. He took advantage of that and betrayed both of the groups of gods, sealing them in their realms, forever, while he stayed on earth, happy with his achievement.”

“Of course, the Dalish have altered the story. But that's not the point right now.”

“What are you getting to?”

Solas got up and walked away from her, looking at the Aurora in the sky. “The story has certain truths. “Fen'Harel was still walking on earth, after sealing the gods. _I was_ still walking on earth.”

“You-” She started. “I don't under-” She shook her head. “That's impossible!”

“It's the truth. For once, I told you the truth.” He lowered his head.

Fendes got up and began pacing back and forth. “No. It can't be the truth. It's a prank. Isn't it? No, it's not like you to pull pranks. But who are you? Why? Why did you tell me now? Why here? I must be going insane!” She rested her hands on the sides of her head.

Her distress saddened him. With a swift move, he rushed to her side and grabbed her from the shoulders. “Pull yourself together.” Solas took a deep breath and began answering her questions. “I am Fen'Harel. I joined the Inquisition to stop Corypheous, that never changed. I thought it'd be easier to tell you in the Fade. And no, you are by no means insane.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks, but she didn't break eye contact. “Solas... I...”

“I am not Solas.” He got away from her. “I am not an apostate elf mage. I am the Dread Wolf. I'm sorry.”

She wiped the tears off her face with the back of her hand. “This is only a nightmare. Tell me it is!” She shouted

“It's not, I am afraid. I'm sorry for hurting you. It wouldn't be a smart move to tell everyone. But I thought you were ready to hear the truth.”

He realized that it was only wishful thinking. She would never be ready to hear that sort of truth as long as she cared even the slightest bit about him. But the lies needed to stop. He felt lighter for telling her the truth, but at the same time he was losing a crucial piece of his existence. Her love.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm down and think. His story fitted much better than the lies he was spreading around. But the lies would have to continue. No one should ever find out. “What now?”

“You have every right to hate me and I'd even advice you to not ever see me again.”

“Is that what you want me to do? Do you want me to hate you?”

The man brought his right hand over his left arm, and rubbed it as if he was cold. “No. But it'd be wise.”

“Look at me.” Fendes grabbed his arm and turned him around.

He averted his gaze. “I can't stand knowing I'm the one who made you cry.”

“I am glad you told me truth. For me, you will always be Solas. The apostate elf I fell in love with.”

“I can't do this.”

The woman bent forward, positioning her face below his so she could meet his eyes. “You chose to tell me the truth, so now we are together in this. I won't leave you.”

Fendes could see no other option. She had to be her usual cheery self, pretending that she was fine. They needed a solution and crying wasn't one.

He smiled sadly. “I always assumed that everything is easier in the Fade. But you proved me wrong twice so far.” He exhaled. “Wake up.”

* * *

 

With that, Fendes jumped up from her dream. Tears were still rolling down her face, and Solas got up from the couch with the intention to leave.

 But she couldn't let him leave. She didn't want to. Not now, that he finally trusted her. “Don't go.” She ran after him. “I love you.”

“Vhenan...”

“Just let me finish what I wanted to do before you rudely woke me up.”

“Fine.” He agreed with a heavy heart and turned on his heel to face her.

“You know, Solas, I can't hate you. Besides, you walked among People before, didn't you? Why can't you do it again, together, with me this time?”

“I can try.”

Without a warning, she pulled him into a hug, kissing his neck before resting his head on her chest. “Ar lath ma, vhenan.”

**Author's Note:**

> I had to satisfy my need for a happy end. Assuming this happens, Solas doesn't disappear in the end and stays with the Inquisitor.


End file.
